I don’t know….

Do you ever find yourself feeling stuck when asked an interesting or challenging question…. or when you are in a very unfamiliar situation in business or even personally… to only answer it with I don’t know (or a similar answer).

That feeling of anxiousness, heat & blankness filling your entire body… leaving us with the feeling of I don’t know swimming around in our mind and thinking.

I’ve been there too… many a time and today, I want to share with you a powerful distinction/insight that will help you surge beyond these blind spots and harness the power of your creativity.

The truth is, I don’t know is one of the least resourceful ways of thinking and responses we could ever conjure up during a time we seek answers or knowledge.

Yet I don’t know seems to be a very natural and easily produced response.

When i’m in the process of coaching my clients, I often hear them say I don’t know when asked powerful questions, but then shortly after, they follow up with but it could be X or Y or Z.

It truly amazes me because not only do they have the answer but the answer comes from within them not outside of them.

Insight 1: Very often when you think you don’t know, most of the time you actually do know…if you give yourself the space & time to reflect in that moment.

Also to believe in YOU a bit more.

Saying I don’t know is just a defensive protection mechanism that stops your mind from doing the deep sea diving and searching for answers.

You could also call it a form of mental laziness to avoid doing the work.

Another of my mentors reminds me that ‘Our language creates our world’ and how much truth does this statement hold as when we use ‘I don’t know’…the vast majority of the time, we end up not knowing.

Very often, I don’t know is just simply a natural response we have wired in to our thinking from a young age by practicing it with repetition and focus during times of uncertainty.

I actually ban my clients from using I don’t know… and they don’t initially like me for it but the rewards are great in the future. (Who said breaking an unresourceful habit is always easy 🙂 )

There is this cheesy coaching question some coaches use when a client is unsure and reads along the lines of:

Client: ‘I don’t know’

Coach: ‘I know you don’t know but if you did know what would you say?’

I told you it was cheesy right? But this inspired way of thinking does produce extraordinary results.

When you don’t know… slow down, take a moment and go within. See what shows up for you.

What would you recommend someone else do if they were in your shoes? If you did know the answer, what would you say or contribute?

Now what happens when you genuinely don’t know the answer… and you are in a situation where you need to find out.

Insight 2: Ask resourceful questions!

One of my mentors often reminds me that our life & business is a direct result of the quality questions we ask or don’t ask.

During moments in your business where you are unsure of the answer…it is very easy to let the mental chatter or monkey mind to take over and disempower us.

One of the best strategies to re-focus and tap in to our personal power is by asking resourceful questions. Questions such as:

How can I find out?

What are 2-3 strategies I can use learn the answer

If I were coaching a best friend on this situation, what would I say?

What would need to happen or be in place for me to reach my outcome

Who else do I know that is likely to have the answer or has been in a similar situation before?

We always get what we focus on.

‘Our language creates our world’

If you want to be more focused & creative, I challenge and invite you to ask powerful questions to direct your mindset for focus and creativity.

Challenge: I also challenge you to ban ‘I don’t know’ from your vocabulary. Challenge yourself and see what happens.

I would love to hear from you and see how the challenge is serving you.

Here’s to your continued success & I hope you enjoyed reading this article.

If there is anything I can serve or support yourself and/or your business or if you have any questions about my latest article then please feel free to reach out to me here or at [email protected].

Live Empowered and make this week extraordinary!

Your friend and coach,

Raghav Parkash